Hello! I've been away for a while, but I'm back now and ready to get into a blog stoush, or make a small spelling mistake so other people can make a big thing about it, or grumble as if a relatively unimportant political event is the worst thing in the world, or get sworn at by trolls, or fulminate furiously about something a celebrity said that I don't agree with. Yes, Christmas and New Year celebrations, and the designated season of happiness that goes with them, is officially over, and we can all get back to what we like best - being miserable. Here were the official events of the year, as can be seen on any standardised calendar:
JANUARY - Worrying and wailing
FEBRUARY - Dreariments and dolefulness
MARCH - Sombreness and solemnity
APRIL - Gloominess and grimness
MAY - Horror and hellishness
JUNE - Awkwardness and anxiety
JULY - Nervousness and nagging
AUGUST - Darkness and despair
SEPTEMBER - Terror and torment
OCTOBER - Maudlin melancholy
NOVEMBER - Lugubrious lamentations
DECEMBER - HAPPINESS!
Well we can all breathe a big sigh of relief now that's over. On reflection, my proudest moment of the general Christmas celebrations was playing a Scrabble game with several younger rellies in which we all managed to get a swear word on the board. Excellent.
So, how have you all been? Read any depressing newspaper stories lately?
UPDATE! - I know what we can have a fight about! Remember a couple of years ago when Patrick McCauley published an Australia Day poem in The Australian and there was a bit of a stoush on the blogs about it? Well I heard McCauley read it out yesterday in the Edinburgh Gardens - and rather enjoyed it. Horrifying! Go on, start abusing me.
I just CAN'T. BELIEVE. that you liked something that everyone else dissed. You're just such a rebel, Tim.
ReplyDeleteWhat was the swear word?
I know - I'm a rebel with a capital 'R'! Or in this case a lower-case one.
ReplyDeleteThree swear words were played, but the one by me was 'Frigs'. I wasn't going to play it until nephew did one of his own devising.
I think it's worth moaning and gnashing our teeth about the rising food prices due to the horrendous flooding in Queensland. I for one hoped everyone felt dreadfully guilty on NYE, setting off ten million trillion dollars of fireworks when all Queenslanders were living in underwater tents. Moan, gnash! Thank you for reminding us about what life's really about, sniff.
ReplyDelete