Monday, July 20, 2026

An Open Close case

 Going down the street the other day (which just happened to be today), the question naturally occurred to me, when you look at a street sign, would the street name and the abbreviated 'st' that follows ever accidentally combine to form a swear word? I know. I'm sure you've all asked the same question before.
 
Not many swear words end with 'st'; after a few minutes of diligent searching - is the internet good for anything if it can't give you all the swear words in the world at the touch of a button? - the best I could come up with was the friendly Pi Street in Los Angeles - which, of course, abbreviates to PI ST. PIST.  It's not bad. It's getting there. Which, if you recall, is precisely what streets are meant to do, get there. 

The internet, unfortunately, is also somewhat lazy and does not yield up answers as to whether one can find a LA ROAD (LARD) or a politically incorrect TA ROAD (TARD). What's the point of roads if you can't use them to spell out offensive words, I ask you? 

I feel I have already covered the important topic of palindromic street names. I dunno. It's probably on this blog somewhere. Hard to find, but there are a few in and around the place, including ADA STREET (Preston), HANNAH ROAD (thank you, Somewhere in South Africa), and the inevitable GLENELG STREET (here's one in Dandenong). It's a somewhat more tricky proposition to find a street or road name (what's the difference between a street and road, anyway? About a lane and a half, I guess) where the name itself and the abbreviation that follows form a palindrome, but have this one - DRAMA RD - in North Carolina. So there you go, NC: it's not just good for cryptic crossword clues! 

Yes, Tim, yes, I hear you cry. (Please don't cry! It's only a story!) But where does it end? Is there such a thing as an ALLIE ALLEY? Does there exist somewhere on God's green earth an OPEN CL - which is to say, an Open Close? Has some civic monster decided to label a small little path the TRICK TRACK? Google Maps, distressingly, provides no answer to these questions. So, probably, no. Which is all terribly disappointing. 

It's all enough to make you want to retire to the charming town of FUCKING, AUSTRIA, where all the street names will have to... oh... wait. They changed their name. 

What a bunch of Fugging Arschlöcher, I tell you! 

1 comment:

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