In the last week, we've had several interstate visitors round, which is lovely, but this morning we've finally had the chance to put the house back in order again.
I started things off by spilling fejoia wine onto the floorboards (although, come to think of it, 'spilling' implies an accidental occurrence; perhaps it would be better to say 'tipping'). I continued in this way by boiling a large pot of water on the stove, and then walking into another room while it repeatedly splashed all over the place.
Meanwhile, I wandered up and down the kitchen in filthy shoes until it was thoroughly muddied up: good. In the bedroom, I patted the cats until copious amounts of fur where whirling and flying through the air, and thoughtfully spread out dark blankets to capture and show off the furs at their best. I took several dirty cheesecloths and muslin bags which I'd used for sparging and infusing beer with hop flavour, and dumped them in bowls of water, before taking them out and flinging them idly into the laundry*; I pulled several clothes out of my cupboard and left them lying on the floor just because I wasn't sure I was living down to my usual standards of filthiness; and I left some old socks that I'd been wearing around the house for the past few days to hang up in some dark cupboard spaces, just to mature.
I'm almost done now. But later, I might leave the door open and be 'surprised' by the chickens coming inside, wait until they've scattered the cat food everywhere and left several fertile fecund messages under the table, and then fill a bucket full of mud and use it to mop up the kitchen some more. Just to add to the general hygienic atmosphere. Ah, home sweet home.
*'...before taking them out and flinging them idly into the laundry' - obviously I am referring here to both the cheesecloths and bowls of water.'
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
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- Hail Paco!
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- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
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- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
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- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
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- Blink and you'll miss 'er
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- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
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- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
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- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- That time I listened to the football with my cats
- How to knead a quarter droplet with naught but an ...
- The best woman man thing for the job!
- Mission proposition
- Doctor vs Doctor
- Put down the milk, sir, and back away from the bat...
- Think thing
- An overstated understatement poem
- A pleasant post about my chickens
- Sodomy by electric eel and the exciting world of c...
- Your life looks like the wreck of the Hesperus!
- It's a high likelihood, and it squeaks
- Pastie-faced people unite
- DC WTF in UK
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