One has to wonder, why do we celebrate our birthdays? We didn't celebrate them when we were actually born - we were too busy doing something else at the time. And if we actually remembered what it was like, the memory would probably be so traumatic that we wouldn't be celebrating it, anyway.
Birthdays, birthdays, birthdays. You know, as someone* once said, being born is really like dying, in reverse. First you're not there, and then you are. Which gives me an idea. What if, instead of celebrating our birth every year, we celebrated our death? I mean, we might as well celebrate it, while we've still got time. It'll give us something to do, rather than being shit-scared about the prospect. Think about it: instead of actually missing out on our own funerals, we'd get to go along, too.
Naturally, we don't know when we're going to die - which is kind of the whole point. Holding our own funeral would be an excellent excuse to get drunk all day, every day. You know, just in case.
Then again, maybe I'll just return to my mother's womb. Nice and safe; no fear of dying there. I'll just call Mum up in a second ...
The womb's a fine and private place
But none, I think, do there embrace ...
What do you think?
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2016 (58)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- Comment on the Comment
- Age Rage
- The Worst Magician In The World ...
- No Comment
- No Words are Good Words
- RUN! RUN! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, RUN WHILE YOU STILL...
- Walkers Walk in the Walk Against Want
- You Young Whippersnappers
- Where Am I?
- Thought For The Day
- More Art, More Soul
- Coat Hangery Meditations
- Writers Are Such Interesting People
- I Have Discovered
- Art and Soul
- Community Service Announcement
- Nutty Story
- Thought For The Day
- ▼ July (23)