Saturday, November 10, 2007

This is not a word game

Prime Minister John Howard has accused Labor of playing word games over whether he should apologise for this week's interest rate rise. - The Age
Well, I for one am glad that the playing of word games by our Federal Politicians has finally been exposed for everyone to know about it. The corruption of word games has reached endemic levels, and it's not clear what, if anything, we can do to stop it.

When questioned on the Prime Minister's charge of 'word games', Mr Rudd stated: "For the record, I am no cunning linguist, but nor is the Prime Minister a master debater. This is just another one of his cunning stunts, but so is he - and spooner or later, he will be found out."
Recent examples of the playing of word games include the frequent use of 'Animal, Vegetable or Mineral' by Federal Shadow Minister for the Environment, Peter Garrett, when questioned on Labor's policy for the environment.

Meanwhile, upon appearing at a recent debate between the Industrial Relations Minister, Joe Hockey, and the Shadow Industrial Relations Minister, Julia Gillard, Abbott delivered a series of anagrams upon Julia Gillard's name that he had been working on.

"Did you know that JULIA GILLARD rearranges to LAUD JAIL GIRL? No? How about DUAL JAR GILL I, LARD JAIL LUG I, DIAL RAJ GULL I, or even A JAG LURID ILL? No? Well, it just goes to show why the Coalition's Industrial Relations Policy is better than Labor's" said Hockey. "Thank you very much."

Horrifyingly, when asked to comment on the rise of word games in politics, Mr Howard and Mr Rudd failed to comment, as they were locked in 'tightly fought' games of Scrabble with their respective members of staff, apart from saying that 'The next game of Scrabble will be hard fought, and a close match...'

It is possible that the playing of word games by our Federal Politicians may finally be reaching a crisis point: upon attending a launch of a school for blind children recently, Tony Abbott offered to play 'I Spy, with My Little Eye' with several of the children present. Not realising his mistake instantly, he even began to offer them a game of Pictionary, but pulled himself up at the last minute.

However, we may also be on the verge of a new era of decadence. If proposals by prominent members of the Labor Cabinet are acted upon, we would see Labor policy in future released as a Findaword, allowing people to pick out only the policies which they find popular, and leave the rest.

Only time will tell...


alexis said...

"John Winston Howard" is an anagram for "John Withdrawn Soon", a jumbling which causes me inordinate pleasure.

Caz said...

You mean all this time the media have been trying to impress us with Rudd's ability to speak Mandarin, but in truth, he's just talking backwards in anagrams?


TimT said...

To answer that question conclusively, we need both a Mandarin speaker, and an anagram speaker, or a combination of both - which is surely, statistically speaking, impossible!

And of course I've also forgotten to mention the uncanny skill politicians have with ludicrous bureaucratic anagrams. GBRMPA, anyone?

TimT said...

John Withdrawn Soon - a most pertinacious jumbling indeed! Verily, that jumbling is humbling!

Dale Slamma said...

I'm wondering if you ever read Jasper Fforde's marvellously silly novels.

TimT said...

Not as yet, no. Did I write a Jasper Fforde style post unwittingly?

Dale Slamma said...

I just thought you might enjoy his style. I am particularly fond of the Thursday Next series where the intrepid Thursday is assigned the task of maintaining the narrative of books such as Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights, from inside the novels.

TimT said...

Thanks for the recommendation. I like a good literature parody, and Fforde's had some good things written about him. A lot of the parody/writing stuff out there is substandard stuff - lazy and self-referential. (Bloody Barry Trotter!)

Maria said...

Just about to read "Barry Trotter and the Massively Wounded Ego"

What've you got against substandard and self-referential, TimT. Nothin' wrong with that, it's what makes Facebook and MySpace so addictive. Or that's what's so wrong with it.

Substandard and Self-referential is the new black!

TimT said...

Let's just say I had a bad experience with a C S Lewis parody recently, by one Michael Gerber - who also wrote some of the Barry Trotter parodies. It was the most horrible, mean-minded, unoriginal stuff around. I don't like it because it distracts attention away from the better self-referential parodies out there, like 'Bored of the Rings'.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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