Sunday, December 16, 2007

Self-defeating ideas

Ku Klux Klan Diversity Sub-committee

Sending Braille messages by telegram

Surgical decapitation

Elevators on top floors

Having a dwarf president to look up to

The Individualists' Society*

Peace negotiations between dog-kind and cat-hood

Sunglasses for evening wear

Turning up early for a Prevaricators Party

God, the atheist

Vegetarian cannibals

*But not The Individualist's Society.


alexis said...

On the subject of vegetarian cannibalism, I've long wondered whether a lettuce that's nourished by the decomposition of another lettuce is a cannibal. Any light you can shed on this vexing moral question would be greatly appreciated.

TimT said...

Sadly, whenever the question of lettuce is raised with me, I get carried away, and shout 'LET US EAT LETTUCE!' to all and sundry, not to mention everyone else. It generally causes whoever I am with to hiss 'please don't say that anymore' at me in a peevish and ill-tempered manner.

alexis said...

I think T. S. Eliot said it best:

Lettuce go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky,
Like a patient etherised upon a table.

TimT said...

Let's not forget St Pauls Lettuce to the Romans.

alexis said...

Written after he got episstled down the pub.

TimT said...

Blowing all his celery away on drink?

Maria said...

I always wanted a spot doing mime on radio.

Maria said...

"Sunglasses for evening wear"

This reminds me of that lovely line in Duncan Ball's "Selby's Secret"

"Suddenly, the sundial struck midnight ..."

It is one of the greatest lines in literature, methinks.

prude said...

Playing Strip Poker with nudists?

I thinks nudists should be playing a game where htey should be putting clothes on!

TimT said...

Not sure if this is a self-defeating idea, but I just had an Italian woman speaking Italian in a nasal voice on the phone thinking I was Mario.

Carry on, everyone.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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