Monday, May 14, 2012

Readers' Undigest

Varieties of the epicurean sneeze

The drink sneeze - Occuring at moments of great surprise or hilarity. Includes the famous 'I spluttered my coffee all over the computer.' Results often quite unobtrusive, unless someone nearby happens to be spluttered over.

The soup sneeze - More serious, as the results can often be colourful.

The muesli sneeze - bearing a remarkable resemblance to porridge.

The coffee and croissant sneeze - If you must do this, make sure you are not eating a good croissant while it happens.

The pesto and spaghetti sneeze - you are eating spaghetti with pesto, sneeze, and all of a sudden what appears to be a jellyfish, coated in seaweed, violently emerges from your mouth, nose, and possibly one or two other body orifices as well. It is possibly the most horrifying thing that will ever happen to you.

Now which of the above do you think happened to me last night?


Anonymous said...

I so hope it was the pesto and spaghetti sneeze. The great thing about that would be that one end of the spaghetti might be protruding from your right (or indeed left) nostril and the other end hanging out of your mouth. That way you could play all manner of games until either the spaghetti broke or your soft palate ached. Beatrice and Harriet might even care to play along.

PS I'm coming to like my ECG nickname.

TimT said...

Ha! Extreme flossing! And so it was the spaghetti sneeze. Thankfully no cats got involved...

Anonymous said...

Did the Baron not photograph the moment?

TimT said...

No. Yet another reason to be thankful! Actually we were both sneezing.

Ampersand Duck said...

It must have been a dusty pesto...

TimT said...

It was utterly dispastarous.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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