According to quantum theory, sub-atomic particles can pop in and out of existence at random intervals. Unfortunately, there is not, as far as I know, a branch of quantum theory dealing with underpants.
Why am I telling you this? Only because there is sitting, on the dinner table at the moment, in my house, a pair of underpants that seem to have come from nowhere. They appeared on the clothes rack last week, after I was taking in my (mostly) dry clothes at the end of the day. I assumed they were my flatmates; I put them back on the clothes rack and mentioned them to him later.
This afternoon I came back and found the underpants sitting on the table. I asked my flatmate why he was leaving them on the table, only to be told that they were 'not his'.
How can a pair of underpants like this mysteriously magic themselves into existence? Where did they come from? To whence are they going? I can only conclude that in my house, I have discovered the existence of a phenomenon that has hitherto been merely the subject of speculation for theoretical physicists and the like: the quantum underpants. I am not reassured by this discovery: quite the opposite. If these underpants can suddenly appear in my house, what about the underpants that I already own? What could they be doing behind my back? They could be wearing other people without telling me! They could decide to vanish, completely without notice, while I have them on!
In the shifting, transient universe of quantum underpants mechanics, anything could be possible.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- The Rants Pants
- A Suggested Cultural Activity
- How to not quite quit
- The Scent of Wet Office Worker
- Underpants of Mystery
- A provocative question
- A Meditation on Human Failings
- Teen Squeam
- A pointless post, in points
- Bottoms! Bottoms! Bottoms! Bottoms! Bottoms! Botto...
- Fat is unpatriotic
- The Weekly Fop #2: Duck Fops!
- Any Tense You've Got
- Fashion! Religion! Bad puns!
- Extra! Extra!
- Review: Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell
- History Segment!
- They Don't Write Books Like They Used To...
- The Weekly Fop #1: Cerealism
- Please Do Not Apply
- An Announcement...
- An Afterthought...
- Too Twee for Two
- If Magazine Subscribers Were Like Football Fanatic...
- For my next trick...
- Tennis? It's All A Load of Balls, Really...
- Six Word Phrases You May Not Want To Hear
- Tales From Earthsea
- A Band Called Rubber
- Postmodernism Explained
- All About Cows
- The Daily Tele Graph
- ▼ June (33)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)