"If a thing's worth saying, it's worth taking a long time to say," says Treebeard in J R R Tolkien's The Two Towers. If anything, this merely understates Tolkien's general position on writing.
I wonder what Treebeard would have to say about spelling, though? Lately, I've taken to unconsciously mispelling words by throwing in a few extra letters, sometimes turning them into a homonym. My favourite seems to be 'throw/through', but I have to keep on catching myself out when writing 'deceit'. I want to turn it into 'deceipt'. Conversely, I have no problem at all with writing out the word 'receipt', and never want to shorten it to 'receit'.
For all you know, some of these mispellings could catch on in years to come. Writing out the word 'slow' is one thing, but the added letters in 'slough' really give you time to draw the whole experience out. Whereas before we 'get' into 'debt', afterwards, we could 'gebt' into 'debt', and meals would not be 'et', they would be 'ebt'. A 'site' of land would become a 'sight' of land (I've had to catch myself out on this mispelling from time to time), and critics could dismiss bad books as 'tright' rather than 'trite'. And, taking a spelling technique from the prefix 'pseudo-', all words currently beginning in 's' could begin instead in a silent 'p': 'pstops', 'pstarts', 'pshiver', 'psimper', 'pstamp', 'psue', and, my personal favourite, because it sounds so onomatopaeic, 'pspit'. Also, I've always been a fan of the queue of letters after the 'q' in the word 'queue' that turns it from a letter into a word. We could equally apply this effect to other letter/word homophones. For instance, 'be' and 'bee' would become 'beee' and 'beeee', or, perhaps for the facetious, 'B1 and B2'.
Then again, perhaps I'm wrong, and the trend of the SMS generation will continue so that, in five years, the whole of human expression will be rolled into one simple, easy to follow, impossible to understand, four-or-five letter acronym.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2016 (69)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- On sounding like a pompous git, #451: letters to t...
- Duck Cat Dog Friday
- Muslim cemetery decreases quality of life for dead...
- Etiquette quiz
- Biographica critica
- On poetry by journalists
- A poem about the curly clouds outside my work wind...
- Quadruple entendre
- A horrifying confession
- Foot-in-the-door-in-the-foot journalism
- Confusing confusion, and passwords
- Ad Homonym!
- Buddy, you got any faith to spare?
- The live dog and the dead lion
- It's a party at my house and no-one's invited
- Bloody hell
- Yet another further further fable for our time
- I also liked their plastic icecream desserts
- Sweeping generalisation
- On the eve of ultimate destruction, I have a sligh...
- Disaster strikes in the wrong place!
- Important things to note on a Saturday morning
- Gentlemen, cognite your engines...
- Guess the headline!
- Stuff sold on ebay
- Short short story
- Pay attention, drones
- It's a coffee cup catchphrase masquerading as a bl...
- ▼ September (28)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)