Posted a corker of a comment the other day. Considering it has almost nothing to do with the subject being blogged about, it's simultaneously one of the worst and the best things I'll ever write. Here it is, in all its glory....
Speaking of feet, I used to speak with feet ... my brother's feet, that is. He called it 'foot' and we used to hold long conversations at the dinner table.
In this modern digital age, maybe it could start up a blog...
THE FOOT BLOG
Hey, I don't mind the guy on the other side ... for a left foot, he isn't so bad. But the owner stepped in something today and hasn't cleaned it off yet, and he's been smelling all day.
*Wonders* Cosmetic surgery can do wonders nowadays. Maybe I should consider being amputated, and starting off a life of my own, free of that smell old left foot...
I went and saw the doctor today. Arranged the amputation for Tuesday.
LIVE AMPUTATION BLOGGING
Hello, here I am in the doctor's surgery, ready for a spot of live amputationg blogging. I've got my laptop here ready for the moment and .... YEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWCH!
My foot hurts.
And considering my foot is all I have now, you'll understand if I'm a little late out of bed.
I feel free! I feel liberated! I think I shall go out into the wide world and see what it has to offer for a foot freed of his bipedal constraints!
I miss my body.
END OF FOOT BLOG
Two days later, the foot was caught by police trying to stitch himself onto a nearby elephant. When asked what he was doing, he said he was just looking for 'some-body to cling on to'.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2017 (33)
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- Footpath Rage
- The Foot Blog
- Because I Have Nothing Better to Post About
- Ways to Make the World a More Perfect Place #5
- Like to read this piece of mine and argue vocifero...
- Ways To Make the World a More Perfect Place #4
- I Love the Taste of Marx in the Morning
- Call Me The Chairman
- Blog Predictions
- Those Whacky Prostitutes (And Other Stories)
- Little Peter Rabbit
- CLOSET HOMOPHOBE!!!
- I May Be an Environmentalist, but I'm Not a Bloody...
- ▼ April (18)