Ways To Make the World a More Perfect Place #4

Instead of having to climb the stairs ourselves, we should be able to hire lithe and nubile young climbers to do it for us. At the rate children are paid nowadays, it should cost, oh, only 5 cents per flight of stairs.

And while standing in queues, customers should be provided with a lounge and a daiquiri so they can relax. I am particularly firm on this last point: waiting in queues is the bane of modern existence, and I'm not going to stand for it any more!