Well, you could have floored me with a feather, decapitated me with a daisy, skewered me with a seaweed, and walloped me with a scallop. Some politician in the good old UK had these wise words to say about rape:
"To suggest that rape, when conducted without violence, is a serious crime is like suggesting that force feeding a woman chocolate cake is a heinous offence."
This politician, one Nick Eriksen, predictably represents the BNP. Presumably he and his colleagues are force-fed chocolate cake on a regular basis as part of the insensitivity training under taken by all BNP politicians. Anyway, the BNP claims, with gleeful abandon, that Eriksen is taken out of context. Taken out of context? It makes you wonder in what context the sentence DID appear originally...
a) Hello! How are you? I'm well, thanks! Rape is like being force-fed chocolate cake!
b) I am very concerned about the increasing gap between rich and poor. Rape is like being force-fed chocolate cake!
c) Speaking of chocolate, and speaking of cake, don't you think rape is like being force-fed chocolate cake?
d) Aren't puppies nice? Rape is like being force-fed chocolate cake!
e) Hey, look behind you! Rape is like being force-fed chocolate cake!
f) Purple monkey dishwasher! Rape is like being force-fed chocolate cake!
If you answered a, b, c, d, e, or f, nope. They're all wrong. If, however, you thought the answer would something more like the following -
Rape is simply sex (I am talking about 'husband-rape' here, for those who deliberately seek to misunderstand me). Women enjoy sex, so this type of 'rape' cannot be such a terrible physical ordeal. To suggest that rape, when conducted without violence, is a serious crime is like suggesting that force feeding a woman chocolate cake is a heinous offence. A woman would be more inconvenienced by having her handbag snatched ... Again, for those who are seeking to cause trouble by deliberately misunderstanding me: yes, violent rape by a stranger in the street is a terrible crime, but I am not talking about that -- I am talking about 'husband-rape'.
You'd be right.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2017 (35)
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- The mangler with the plan
- Summat summit about nowt
- In which the author surveys the cutlery, and proph...
- More pressing questions of intergalactic import
- Fully-grown bunny likes to look at pictures of oth...
- Woof! Woof!
- A country town is like picking your nose: discuss
- Efficient time-management skills
- I have no idea what this means
- Our parapraxis will make you send for the paramedi...
- Plumbing the depths
- Arghhhh! I'm dying, man! I'm dying!
- Et in Nostalgia ego
- Kids today!
- Should homosexuality be compulsory for Anglican cl...
- Some recent Freudian slippers
- I am absolutely thrilled, 26 hours from now!
- Vote the bastards back!
- It's freaking me out, man!
- Mere earthly dogs
- An encounter with a disorganisation
- The Kingsley and I
- The out of context game!
- Freudian traumas about wimples
- Possible names for future fables
- Driving, it's a hit and hit affair
- Move along here, nothing to see
- ▼ April (27)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- ► 2005 (287)