Wednesday, June 13, 2012

In training for the International Long Distance Mixed Metaphor Endurance Competition

The straw that broke the back of the camel trying to fit through the eye of the needle in the haystack while casting out the mote in the eye of the needle of his brother while not casting out the beam from his own frying pan into the fire because it was too busy thinking the pot calling the kettle black was racist.


It’s not everyone’s storm in a cup of tea but what it all boils down to is that any port in a storm will do for plenty of fish in the sea rather than just shooting them in the barrel which is full of monkeys anyway, which lets the cat out of the bag about the elephant in the room, which is deserting the tea cup like rats from a sinking gravy train.


How long is a piece of string if it is as straight as the crow flies in the sky that’s as high as the eye of the elephant in the room in the plain on Spain that the rain falls on during the rainy day that we are saving up something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue for, and can someone stop the angels dancing on the head of the needle so we can put the string through it’s eye in the haystack before the camel tries and breaks it back with the aforementioned straw?

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