kidattypewriter

Saturday, May 03, 2008

World's oldest 48-year man about to break a new record!

It's just another amazing day of records broken for Jeremiah Grimble, the world's oldest 48-year man!

Mr Grimble, who is the only man to have leaped the longest metre in Australia, the tallest man under the height of 1.82 metres to wear a deerstalker hat, and owner of the shortest six-syllable name (counting by syllable) for the Thursday/Friday period, is currently in training for the regional BLCAA championships.

The BLCAA - or Ballarat Lounge Chair Audio Awards - is a bimonthly event held every year* in the Ballarat town centre.
Contestants gather together, and compete to see who can most convincingly imitate the mating cry of the domestic Lounge Chair in its native habitat. Results will be judged by a series of experts, some of whom have over 20 years experience of sitting in lounge chairs in pursuit of their studies.
However, competition will be fierce, with several of Mr Grimble's contestants previously gaining plaudits in sports of skill and endurance. These include:

- Ms Janice Elia Plubbs, acclaimed owner and breeder of Australia's most convergent set of parallel lines, and driver in the famous Mobius Strip car race of two years ago;

- Ms Ellen Fitzwilliam-Iggs, possessor of the vertically highest passage of printed words in existence;

- Arthur Chubb, aka 'The Great Smerg', who has won previous acclaim for his amazing endurance feat of having lived through the slowest two hours in history without drinking more than one cup of water.

Mr Grimble says he is taking nothing for granted, but enters the BLAA after having gained second place in the recent Box Hill Musical Eisteddfod, for which he gave a successful performance of air guitar for a judging panel consisting mostly of street mimes.

*Bimonthly but held every year: that way, it saves money.

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