The link that should have stayed missing

(With apologies to the Club and the real missing linkers.)

The link that should have stayed missing All the news fit to chisel on a cave wall: blog links for Primitive Man. ISSUES The blogger in the cast-stone cave maintains: "Just because we're troglodytes doesn't mean we have to act like one." Oz Neanderthal proposes a bold new idea for the furtherance of his progressive ideals amongst his fellow neanderthals. He calls it the patriarchy. Big Man Lambert warns his tribe of the dangers of the coming glacial age. Meanwhile, the Merkelman invents the wheel and tries to patent it. Small problem: the patent office isn't going to be in existence for another ten thousand millenia... The religious debate we had to have! Cro-Magnon Lad extols the virtues of the Earth Mother, "The Ever Fruitful one, who has given life to us all!" Meanwhile, The Druid proposes we all make human sacrifices to propitiate the wrath of the Mighty Sky God! INTERNATIONAL Caveman Blair is feeling understandably patriotic, and proposes we adopt a new anthem: "Let them all go to hell, except cave 17!" Could the discovery of fire be used as a weapon by terrorists? The Cro-Magnon Lad says yes. Amazon About Town dares any man to face her tribe of Amazons and live to tell the tale! ARTS Primitive Theatre Notes attends three avant-garde sacrificial ceremonies. Her verdict? NOT ENOUGH BLOOD! The Purple Tribe, meanwhile, attend the opening of the new Lascaux Caves conceptual artspace, finding that "while the play of light and shade is exquisite, and the compositions are skilfully conceived, there is very little truly original in this rendition." Homo Slammaticus is present at the creation of music, and says: "To much rock, not enough roll." SNARK, STRANGENESS AND CHARM The Piltdown Man has a blog, and dares you to prove otherwise! Australopithecine Lefty is a shy and gentle woodland creature living off the nuts, roots and berries of the forest floor. He is also a left-winger. Why not pay him a visit? Nailpolish Ochres invents beer, and celebrates by inventing drunkenness. Homo Lexiconicus has been invited to work in an exciting new Government project, the Tower of Babel. Will she accept?