Wednesday, October 07, 2009

WTFF Patriotic Edition


- Behemoth outer space monster descends upon New York City engorging the entire metropolis in a gigantic ball of flame, millions die, Australian slips and grazes his finger!

- President Obama expected to make statement shortly about the finger of the Australian, millions dead.

- Prime Minister Rudd calls upon the President to deliver assurances that other Australian's fingers won't get grazed.


- SCIENCE: Wife of mother of daughter of uncle of aunt of partner of person who once belonged to a dog owners' club with pen pal of person who corresponded with a naturalised Australian wins Nobel Prize.

- OPINION: Why the rest of the world should do something about global warming, before an event of minor irritation happens to Australians.

- OPINION: Is the rest of the world the arse end of Australia? Clearly, yes.

- SPORTS: Devastating catastrophe, world mourns, as Australia loses to England in the cricket. Royal Commission into the unfolding tragedy due to begin shortly, the entire population of Australia offered trauma counselling.

PLUS: Crosswords, Sudoku, etc, INSIDE!


Caz said...

One local dead person currently equals 342 off-shore dead people.

Extrapolating from that fact: one Australian-national killed while off-shore equals 342,000 foreigners killed anywhere.

Dan the VespaMan said...

We need to know these things. Being a small nation (of a piddling 22 million) we may personally know that person with the grazed finger.

TimT said...

Well of course I knew him. It was Bruce. Luckily he put a band-aid on it.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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