Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Fearful apprehension of mysterious events that are also secret at an undisclosed Melbourne university!

Oh wow, Tim, something really exciting just happened... a helicopter has just landed on the uni oval... it's like something out of a Dan Brown novel! - The Baron

The sleek black helicopter silently dropped out of the clear evening skies onto the college lawn. Well the helicopter wasn't so much a sleek black as a ruddy white and blue, but it did drop down, though not so silently: it was quite noisy actually. It wasn't evening either, and the skies weren't particularly clear: it was still morning and, being autumn, there were a number of clouds in the sky. Also, it was an oval the helicopter landed on, not a lawn. And, because this was Australia, it was a university, not a college. So, all in all, it would make more sense to say that the non-sleek, un-black helicopter dropped, quite noisily, out of the partly cloudy skies at a time that was either afternoon, dawn, morning, or somewhere in between, onto the large grassy area that was used for sporting activities, at the particular Melbourne university at which this incident was observed.

One by one, armed FBI officers fanned out into the courtyard. Well, we've already established that this is Australia, and so they wouldn't be FBI officers I suppose. And there was only one of them too, but he certainly did come out one by one, and fanned out, though not, of course, into the courtyard, which was an oval, and not for very long either; after fanning out for a second or so he just stood there.

Behind the thin column, Langdon, and the famous, tall, glamorous, auburn-haired Madame Coco de Milo watched with fearful apprehension while - though I should state right here and now that the column was so thin as to be zero inches thick, which is to say, it was non-existent; Robert Langdon was sleeping peacefully in his bed on the other side of the world, and therefore not present for the occasion of this incident, or the incident of this occasion; and the Madame Coco de Milo, while she was there, had chestnut hair, not auburn, and spectacles, and she was speaking on a mobile phone, and had a different name which she had possessed since birth, and it is actually an open-question whether she was the famous Madame Coco de Milo at all (whoever the famous Madame Coco de Milo was, and also presumably is), though she was looking on with fearful apprehension, or perhaps a better way to describe it would be apprehensive fearfulness, at least - while, I say, they clutched in their hands, (or perhaps Langdon clutched in his hands, because it would be rather difficult for them to be both clutching it at once) the crumbling papers that contained the secret puzzle that would unveil the final diabolical mystery, both which were implicit in the initial ancient cipher unveiled in the depths of the subterranean vault in Degraves Street, Melbourne.

Meanwhile, in the laneway underneath the bridge leading in to university, a semi-important man with responsibility for the photocopiers in the Sociology Department, stubbed his toe...


Steve said...

Better writing than Dan Brown, I say.

TimT said...

To be released next month! It's going to be the sensation of the season!

Email: timhtrain - at -

eXTReMe Tracker

Blog Archive