Received a nice comment about one of my posts today by email.
Now, I love getting praise about things that I write. But, like most writers, when I do get the praise, I feel disappointed.
I think it might have something to do with the schizophrenic nature of any writer - one minute you think you're a genius, the newest of the new, the avant-gardeist of the avant-garde. The next you look in despair at your work and see the same old tricks, the same old cliches: it doesn't flow, it doesn't make sense, it doesn't make you laugh, cry, think - it doesn't make you do anything.
So, as a writer, you alternately want to see these sides of your personality affirmed or denied; you welcome criticism but at the same time you long for praise.
And with blogging, you're never sure what you're going to get. It's in the nature of the medium to be both immediate and remote. As a blogger, you have an audience, but you're never sure who they are, what they're feeling, and how they react to your posts.
It's a bit like going on to a stage in front of a vast audience, staring into the footlights, and reciting some piece you've prepared, and you're not sure what the audience thinks of you, or what they think of the piece, or even who they are, really. With these exceptions: the stage is metaphorical, you're making the recitation up as you go along, and the audience are all sitting at home or at work in front of their computers.
Sometimes you produce mini-masterpieces. Sometimes, absolute nonsense. You usually don't even know what you mean yourself.
You are blogging into the void.
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1 comment:
Void schmoid. You are fucking hilarious. Stop angsting and get on with it.
PS - you also inspired me to write my own piece on kids tv. I see far too much of it in my job. Stand-by for a bit on incisive commentary on 'Brum.'
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