Been cleaning the house today.
You don't really notice how much dirt can accumulate in the cracks between the tiles in the shower stall until you actually clean it. But no, the closer you look you see a thriving multiculture of mould and soot and germs and mildew, all of them growing, one on top of the other. So today, I committed possible species genocide and hacked and hewed into this mini-environment in my shower stall with some wet rags, soap, and home-brand Creme Cleanser. When oh when will we multicellular mammals learn to live in harmony with our fellow bacteria and fungus? On the whole, I think it would be better if we didn't have to clean the shower stall. Much less work, too.
Did the toilet next. Actually, my toilet is pretty clean; I did it a few weeks ago. When I went down to my brother's place in Leichville two years ago, now, there was a toilet to write home about. It was the sort of toilet in which grease and dust combined with algae; the sort of toilet in which you suspected strange, supernatural, alien sentiences resided; the sort of toilet that biologists could sail down and find new forms of life hitherto unknown to man, before returning with two men down and another dying of malaria. That sort of toilet.
By contrast, my toilet is like one of the fountains of Rome, a veritable sculpture, pristine in porcelain.
Fascinating things, toilets. When my parents lived in Coolah, a frog took up residence in their toilet. When you went in to do your duty, you could hear it croaking merrily away, completely unphased what was going on above.
Perhaps if you have a toilet story, you could share it in comments.
I was thinking, while I did the sink and the stove, working around it with a knife to scrape off those tough bits of mould, how much work you do to get the bond money back. Just to please a couple of people. People! If there was one thing I would change about life, it would be people. Over the year-and-a-half that I've lived here, I've accumulated quite a lot of mess. Papers on the floor, plastic bags, that sort of a thing. But - and here's the amazing thing - I haven't noticed it at all, unless people have been around! People can be so selfish that way. I'm of the opinion that they should probably be banned, or turned into more useful or interesting things, like tasty muffins, or mantlepiece ornaments. That, or new and exciting species of mould to inhabit the cavernous cracks in the shower stall.
Except for you, of course, dear reader.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2017 (36)
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- ► 2006 (373)
- Two Degrees of Separation, Blog Style
- Coffee Spoonerisms
- My TV Loves Me
- Blogging At Work
- Housecleaning Meditations
- But What About the Scat Pack?
- Just So You Know
- Blog Dates from Hell
- Dear John
- Go or No?
- Blogging Into the Void
- I Am Diverse, Multicultural, and Tolerant
- Horsing Around
- Definitive Proof
- Woman Talk Man Talk
- Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Brisvegas
- Imperial Measurement of the Week
- Hate Mail Anticipated
- Blabbering about Jabbernoir
- Channel Quiggin
- Your Assistunc Plez
- Pregrogblog Blogpost
- Supposedly Funny Contribution made to Allegedly 'F...
- The Romantic Redneck
- Morning With The McBeths
- The Ill Begotten Spawn of Satan and a Poo Sandwich...
- Baghdad Girl
- Caught Within Her Steely Talons
- Pro Procastination
- Don't Blame Me, I Only Wrote It
- Vote For Me, But Not Too Much
- Things Every Little Boy Should Know
- Happy New Year
- ▼ January (36)