Sunday, November 01, 2009

What Katy Didn't Do Next

So what did you do this weekend? Now there's a damned loaded question if ever I've heard one. I'll tell you what I did: I thought of things that I was going to do, and then went and thought of more things that I was going to do, and then went and thought of a whole bunch of other things that I was going to do, and then forgot the first bunch of things that I was going to do while being distracted by thinking of another bunch of things that I was going to do, and forgetting another bunch of things that I was going to do.

I present, as a case in point, a list. I wrote it on Friday. It's a list of things that I was going to, but so far haven't, written about. I like to write lists of things that I'm going to write about. Not only does it give you a completely pointless sense of accomplishment about things that you haven't done, but you can also neglect to read about them later (another useful way of forgetting about things).

Life 3.0 - a Users Guide

News article from a Wishy Washy person

Abecedarian Poem about typing

Facebook enemies list

There were several other items in that list. And all completely incomplete, I might note. I did get around to writing a rough draft of one of these items, but that might be all I ever do write of it.

It's most distracting to think, don't you think? I've been having thoughts for practically all my life, and I can tell you that as soon as you've thought of one thing, another thing comes along and you're suddenly thinking about that, and it's impossible to hold those two things in your head at once. I don't know how philosophers manage to think so determinedly about one subject over the course of an entire book. How do they stop themselves from being distracted? Maybe they spend most of their time not thinking, and that time they spend not thinking provides them with the lack of distraction they need to write their book.

As for myself, I spend half my day trying to remember the ideas that I had hours ago, and being frustrated because I can't remember them, while in my frustration, other ideas suddenly occur to me, as if they had been lurking in my head, waiting for just this moment to irritate me. Thinking about one thing while all this is going on, well, it's like climbing up a mountainside, while an avalanche is thundering down upon you, and a hurricane is whirling about you, and a vulture is sitting on your head trying to peck out your eyes, and a plane is shooting at you, and you are wearing only your underpants; and you are not only the person climbing up the mountainside, you're the avalanche thundering down as well as the hurricane, the vulture, the aeroplane, the person in the plane, and the underpants.

So please! Tell me what you were going to do this weekend but didn't do this weekend because you thought of other things you were going to do this weekend and caused you to forget those other things you were going to do on the weekend before spending half a day trying to remember what those other things you forgot were (and presumably still are) after you have forgotten them.


nailpolishblues said...

I slept in - a lot, napped a bit, cooked and cleaned a very little, and did a lot of nothing but relaxing. You should try some of these things before your brain explodes.

TimT said...

Sleeping is exhausting, so I'm not surprised you had to nap immediately after you slept.

I cook but avoid cleaning wherever possible.

nailpolishblues said...

I needed to clean in order to cook. I have priorities - food poisoning is not among them.

Sleeping is exhausting? So sayeth the lucid dreamer, perhaps.

Dan the VespaMan said...

For goodness sake, I cooked and did some cleaning this weekend too. It's a little depressing.

Aren't we supposed to be climbing Everest and jumping out of planes and writing groundbreaking novels and solving world poverty and invading Canada and eating lots of icecream on our weekends?

By the way, anyone know the best way to get a pasta sauce stain out of a rug?

Caz said...

Dan - wipe, wipe, wipe, with a cloth wrung out with COLD water, in the first instance. Hot water will tend to set any stain (most particularly anything with protein, eg, blood).

Try Napisan after that, warm water.

Depending on the color of the carpet, last resort is Dynamo (liquid version), but it can clean a car engine, so if your carpet is coloured, you might end up with a bleached out - clean - spot. Do a colour test first in some inconspicuous spot.

Of course, you can always try a bit of bicarb of soda, mixed with water, let dry & vacuum off.

What I did do before:

I did the linen washing (a fortnightly task), then off to the laundry to dry it.

Shaved legs and underarms, after which one has to vacuum the bedroom. Also vacuumed the bathroom. With long hair (on head, not legs or underarms), one tends to drop sufficient locks to knit a small animal roughly each fortnight, or a large animal once a month.

I shopped a little, some summer slippers for self, some slippers & jim-jams to put away for Xmas for the Princess & the son-in-law. At least I've started the Xmas shopping, some small satisfaction in that.

Read quite a bit, trying to get through a small mountain of accumulated "review" sections from The Australian, and the numerous color mags from Saturday papers - I think I'm about four months behind now, which I'd like to reduce to no more than a month by Xmas, so that Xmas hols can be spent with real books.

Oh, I searched for ducks. I have a massive new collection of new ducks awaiting use in 2010. That was another grand achievement.

I put myself on a waiting list (long, far too long) to have some tattoos done.

Cleaned the bathroom.

That's about it.

Ate some very nice cake yesterday.

nailpolishblues said...

Caz, you make me feel like an enormous underachiever. I must remember to tell my mother that the hair thing is not just me. She tends to over-react about how much I shed.

Caz said...

Oh no, don't feel that way Nails.

I slept in until midday on Saturday and 11am today -ugh! Talk about lazy-arsed, even I was disappointed in me.

On Friday I had too moles removed from my arm, both harmless, I just didn't like them. It's taken me TWO YEARS to get around to having a ten minute procedure. Yes, that would be 24 MONTHS - actually a bit more, but who's counting?

I like to think of all the hair that doesn't end up in the corners of my home as wafting around the streets of Melbourne, Nails. It's almost comforting to think that a little bit of me is in every nook & cranny of the city. Or maybe it's just creepy?

And yes, do tell your mother that it's not only you - you do not possess evil hair that is taking over the universe. Others are doing their bit to help you fulfill that goal.

Paul said...

I was going to give you a big round of applause and buy you a beer for your brilliant comment at Overland re creativity but I forgot, sorry.

Mitzi G Burger said...

On Saturday I ate Qinoa congee at Kings Cross markets and admire people who let their pet dogs drink from the overly chlorinated El Alamein Fountain.

I introduced my Canadian friend (whose country I won't be invading soon) to my Sydney mates and we wafted like waifs through the Newtown goth festival in search of "pitchers" of beer.

Over beer I road tested some more Canadian friends and found them to my liking, most genial chap and chappette, as we all together strove to avoid sunburn.

At night I wore my new too-tight tassled ankle boots to a party with terrible music where I watched my sexy friend in a fashion show. Then I had lots and lots and lots of perverted fun and then I woke up and it was not all a dream!

In amongst such debauchery as daylight would allow, I baked a ginger cake and helped host my Finnegans Wake Reading Group.

There is only one single problem with spending one's weekend actually doing things and being done, and that is, one's blogging gets backlogged and left until AFTER the weekend.

Dan, if you ever need assistance eating ice cream on a weekend let me know, as I have severe chocolate restrictions and I am only allowed it (even in ice cream corm) on weekends.

TimT said...

Chocolate restrictions? That's one thing that, having contemplated, I'm glad not to have done. I'm going to get chocolated up now.

Dan the VespaMan said...

Caz... thanks for the stain removal tips. Unfortunately, manual labour and I are not getting along at the moment. I was hoping there was a way I could just convince the stain to leave of it's own free will but negotiations are at an impasse.

Mitzi... There were rumours of a cocktail and cake festival occurring before long. Perhaps icecream should not be omitted from the celebration.

Tim... Chocolate restrictions! Such a suggestion is evil.

Caz said...

Oh, I see. In that case, speak directly to the stain, sternly:

"out damn spot, out"

"be gone you pesky dropped pasta sauce"

And such like, until the stain recedes.

TimT said...

Dan, if you don't master the pasta, you may end up with a pasta disaster.

Yes. Not helpful at all I'm afraid.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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