Saturday, September 25, 2010

Proposal for a new AFL team

So after this whole football Grand Penultimate today, with Collingwood being the team everyone loves to hate, and the Saints being the team everyone hates to love, I thought I'd propose a new football team. A team for the times. A team for the mystifying, baffling, pointless, directionless times we all live in. The team that everyone doesn't care about not caring about.

Name of team
North-South-East-Western Globules

Grey and beige.

Undecided, of course, though maybe Eden-Monaro is the place for them, since that lot are permanently undecided.

Team song
CHORUS: Carn! Carn! The grey and the beige!
Maintain your ineffectual rage!
Fight fight fight! War war war!
And win a devastating draw!

VERSE: Hey, is there anything else on the telly man?
No, I don't care if we are at the stadium, seriously, change channels.

CHORUS: Carn! Carn! etc.

Team food
Cinnamon donuts, with a hole so big that there's no donut left over.

Possible chants

Like, you know, whatever.


It's never too late!

Team philosophy
It doesn't matter if you draw or lose, what matters is how indifferently you play the game.


Mitzi G Burger said...

An indifferent new team would add a whole new dimension to footy-tipping - you'd care even less that you put your $2 in the bucket at the beginning of the season.

Ann O'Dyne said...

as you go through life brother, keep your eye upon the donut, not upon the hole.

Melbourne Cup to be inseparable dead-heat, stay tuned for part 3 of FenceSit Nation

Yrs truly, maintaining the ineffectual rage.

TimT said...

Team drink: tea, made from tea bags, without the tea.

Jeremy said...

I think you're describing my team, Melbourne.

Email: timhtrain - at -

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