Paris, France: Chaos hit the streets of the Capital of Culture today, as gangs of brawling babies turned violent. The rampaging rogues in nappies upturned cars, smashed windows, and burned bikes in a day of protests aimed at dummy-reform laws introduced into Parliament by the Chirac Government.
A typical evil baby.
President Chirac and Prime Minister de Villepin held crisis talks today about the baby problem. "We cannot give in to the demands of these babies," stated Chirac, "whatever the demands these babies are making happen to be." At this point, he pounded the table for emphasis, forgetting that he did not have a table.
What can have caused these babies to turn violent? Several theories are current, including: they are following orders of a shady international conspiracy of toddlers; they are hungry and want a drink; or, they just want their mummies.
But it is clear that something must be done about these babies, and done now.
IN OTHER BABY DEVELOPMENTS:
Canberra, Australia: - Angry babies marched on the Prime Minister's office, demanding immediate change. Although they didn't so much march as crawl. And it's not entirely clear what sort of change they were demanding, as they hadn't learned to talk yet. But they did gurgle quite eloquently. One politician has suggested that their nappies may need changing.
Smigginston, Ohio: - Two naughty babies were found in a movie theatre watching Bride of Chucky without having paid for a ticket. Their parents have been notified.
Dusseldorf, Germany: - A gang of naughty babies called the Terrible Toddlers have successfully annoyed their parents by pissing, pooing, vomiting, bawling, and conspiring to take over the world.
DID YOU KNOW: - In 1926, the Prince of Austria attempted to start WW II by sending the Prime Minister of France a baby. The baby was so cute, that they both agreed to forgive all their differences, and peace was declared.
Tim, your links stink, you fink!
- John Bangsund's Threepenny Planet
- Broken Biro
- Poetry 24
- Superlative scribbles
- Kirstyn McD!
- Rorrim a tsomla almost a mirror
- More Sterne
- Cam the man from the Dan.
- Too hot to Raaaaaaandallllllll!
- Erin's Excellently Everlasting Effervescements!
- Slammy Infamy
- Hail Paco!
- Baron Blandwagon, purveyor of cyberbunnies, hawker of Roger Corman, and Misruler of the Multiverse
- The Bolta. Aiyeeeeee!!!!!
- Bad Apple Audrey
- The cartoon church
- Sir Martinkus
- A Zemblanian abroad and at home
- A hodge podge of hotzeplotz
- THE SLAMMA!
- Jottlesby's nottings, or should that be Nottlesby's jottings?
- The Snarking of the Hunt
- Jazzy Hands
- David of Metal City
- David the Barista
- The Blogger on the Cast Iron Balcony
- Be an Opinion Dominion Minion!
- ... and Fel
- His brilliant career - from whale sushi to crumbed prawn
- Jo Blogs
- Yet another Tim
- Was two peas, now three peas
- ... Still Life - now with extra rotating cats!
- An Amazingly Awesome Australian Ampersand!
- Blink and you'll miss 'er
- Red in the land of the tigers!
- Wire of Vibe
- Chase him, ladies, he's in the cavalry!
- The Non-palindromical Editrix in Germanium
- Old Sterne
- The briefs...
- ... and the brieflets
- The Purple Blog
- Blairville, lair of all that is wicked and perfidious
- The enticingly acronymical CSH
- EXTREEEEEEEME WYNTER!
- Mark of California
- Silent Speaking
- Lexicon the Mexican
- ► 2017 (40)
- ► 2016 (71)
- ► 2015 (106)
- ► 2014 (135)
- ► 2013 (173)
- ► 2012 (275)
- ► 2011 (261)
- ► 2010 (288)
- ► 2009 (290)
- ► 2008 (316)
- ► 2007 (392)
- The Art of Vision
- The Natural History of Smirking
- Nine American Comedies
- Liberal Except When It Comes To Other People
- Talking About The Weather
- Suppress The Urge
- This Is Your Strife #1
- Anti Trees
- The Little Things
- Boganism, the Gentleman's Pursuit
- Naux Faux
- Important Question
- Possible Faux Pas
- Otter Codswallop? Or, a Tale of Herring-Do?
- The Bloggrogging ...
- Babies Are Evil!
- Attention Women!
- Was Kingsley Responsible for Martin's Books?
- An Imbibulation Invitation
- Cartoon Characters with Strange Relationships
- Junk Premier
- Anyone Remember This?
- Saturday Political Cliche Special
- Symbionese Whispers
- Film With Actors In It
- Foucalt You!
- Rash Decisions
- On Matters Literary
- Still More Fun Pets For Your School!
- The Will Type For Food Fashion Watch: A Public Ser...
- ▼ June (32)
- ► 2005 (287)