Onoooooooooooooooooooootel

"If a motel is a hotel for cars," I said, "A hotel for boats is a flowtel."

Well, what do you think of that? Not bad, I thought. Not bad - for an off-the-cuff remark late on a Friday night while one is out with one's parents and one has maybe drunk one or two pots of rather nice beer and is feeling rather expansive.

The trouble is, I thought this joke was so uniquely original and wonderful that I repeated it to the Baron the day afterwards while we were both on a long train trip. And then spent the rest of the hour with her turning up new versions of the same pun. A partial list is provided below.

A hotel for turtles is a slowtel
A hotel for assumed identities is a fauxtel
A hotel for boyfriends is a beautel
A hotel for emergencies is an 000tel
A hotel frequented by the Three Stooges is a Larrycurlymotel
A hotel for display is a showtel
A luminescent hotel is a glotel
A hotel for ski trips is a snowtel
A hotel for conferences regarding the significance of 19th-century American fantasy literature is a Poetel
A hotel with a particularly rancorous odour is an eaughtel
A hotel where they hold elections is a votel
A hotel for Santa Claus's is a hohohotel
A hotel for epistemologists is a knowtel
A hotel for Napoleon's girlfriend is a Jotel
A hotel for cloven-hoofed ruminants is a goatel...

Anyway. You can see where this is all going, and where it has been - nowhere particularly interesting. However, it's worth noting that a hotel for women of ill-repute is a hotel, and a hotel for people with moustaches is a motel. Also - and this has just occurred to me now - a hotel full of tinea sufferers is a toehel.