Vote for Beatrice in the Whiskas competition!
THE BEATRICE FOR HIGHER OFFICE COALITION
If you could take a little time out of your busy schedules today to place a vote for our cat, Beatrice, in this competition, we'd be much obliged:
A vote for the Beatrice Party will benefit you in many ways:
- Beatrice has pledged to increase quotas of cuteness in everyday life.
- Beatrice is a cat of the people (and I bet you've never heard any other politician described as a 'person of the cats', have you? Exactly.) She understands and sympathises with the struggles of everyday working life.
- Beatrice has spots. And very nice ones, too. If she wins the majority of your votes, she will bring these spots to as many citizens as possible.
- Something about working families.
- A vote for Beatrice means a laptop for every child!
Well we're not too sure about that last one. But one final point:
- Beatrice is a genuine, honest cat. With Beatrice, you always know what you're going to get.
Please don't be distracted by the opposition, who have resorted to cheap gimmicks like putting their cats in ties. Let's get back to the real issues - ie, cats in boxes. Or possibly household cleaning implements.
Authorised by Timothy Train of the Beatrice For Higher Office Coalition, Melbourne.