After I had the shower I got out the cereal and took it into the loungeroom and switched on the television.
There, on the television, was a Hoob:
Not being in the mood for Hoobs, particularly, I switched the television over to the next channel. And there was the freaking Hoob again!
I started getting twitchy. Was I hallucinating? Was I stuck in some kind of weird time loop, watching the Hoobs over and over again? Or, maybe ... where the Hoobs TAKING OVER ALL THE TELEVISION STATIONS? I flicked the dial back to the first station which, I thought, should have been SBS. What you get on SBS normally are Serbs and Croats shouting at one another, or naked French ladies. That is the way of the world. That is the way things should be. You do NOT expect to see Hoobs broadcasting out to the world.
Now, maybe you think I'm being paranoid. Maybe you might reply that my flatmate had, for some reason or other, changed the channel settings, or something like that. Maybe you're one of those people who think the Hoobs are just cute and cuddly fictional-critters that I shouldn't get too worked up about. But so what if I'm paranoid? Remember the paranoiacs first dictum: just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean everyone's not out to get me?
I would like to make it quite clear that I do not support the Hoobal domination of our television networks. I would like anti-Hoobal legislation to be passed immediately in the parliament and for all Hoobs to be deported from our country immediately as a matter of urgency. For too long, we have allowed Hoobal elements of our society to plot and plan ways to subvert our basic freedoms, and we must do something about it now. And I want everyone to know that I, for one, do NOT support our new Hoobal overlords.
Oh well. At least it wasn't the Boo Bah.
6 comments:
I'll see everyone in a moment. I'm just popping out to buy a tinfoil hat from the local store.
those boobah blob things look absolutely evil, do they speak?
They just kind of gargle menacingly. If you haven't seen the program, then you're very lucky indeed. It's a Japanese program originally.
That's right: Japan, the nation responsible for World War 2 in the Pacific, the Power Rangers, Gamera, epilepsy-inducing Pokemons, and now - Boo Bah. They've got a lot to answer for.
I have no idea what a Hoob is. But if you combine it with a Boo Bah (no idea what that is either), you get a Hoo-Hah. Which is sort of like, but not, a Hoo-Hoo. Ha ha.
The hoobs aren't too bad, really. They're furry aliens who seem to be on some kind of fact-finding mission on the earth, and whenever they want to find out about something, they hop in a van and drive off to consult the Greatest Authority Possible - a bunch of kids. At the same time, they sing something like,
"We're off to see the tiddly-peeps,
Hooray, hooray, hooray ..."
There's also a bunch of robots who pop up from time to time. I'm not sure what their function is, except to sing things like the 'How' song:
"How, how, how
How, how, how,
How, how, how, how, how."
Deep.
And Vague, I can just imagine the Brou Ha Ha if the Boo Bah were crossed with the Hoob to make a Hoo Hah.
boobahs are scary. they are like the love children of tinky winky (of tellytubby fame) and a slightly drunk cupie doll.
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