Craptacular in Technicolour

Premonition is a splendiferous piece of flapdoodle about a woman who is told one day that her husband is dead and then finds out the day after that that he is alive. On the following day she goes to his funeral and then the day after that he's alive again in her house. Then she goes kind of nuts and a doctor named Roth takes her to hospital and puts a needle in her arm and then she wakes up again in her house to find that it's four days before and she sends off her husband to the park while she goes to the church to have a chat to the local priest, (an unassuming man with a slaphead and a voice like a Disney film narrator) about 'unexplained phenomenon'. There's also some shit in there about a falling telegraph pole and an accident with a glass door and her husband having an affair with someone or other at work, but frankly, I drifted off during a lot of that.

I quite like films like Premonition, they're unpretentious and unassuming little thrillers about nothing much from the studios of someoneorother, and they fill up the Sunday evening quite nicely. But can you imagine what it would be like actually living your life like this? Say, if all 24 hours of your day happened in a mixed up order? You'd put the pie in the oven at 5.00 just one hour after finishing it off with friends at 7.00 and you'd only pull it out of the oven to cool off one hour before you got out of bed in the morning, and you'd end up getting confused and eating breakfast at the end of the day at a time when you're supposed to be driving down to the supermarket and buying the groceries for lunch. You'd be frankly too confused to go through all of that ludicrous melodrama that Sandra Bullock goes through in this film.

In conclusion, I think the lesson to be drawn from Premonition is quite clear, and is either one of three things:

a) Hold on to your loved ones because you're not sure when they're going to die and you can't stop them a day before you see that they're alive even though you still think they're dead;

b) Doctors with beards are not to be trusted, but slaphead priests are pretty cool, man;

c) It's okay if you don't have faith, because you have to fight to have faith in whatever you should have faith in but oh my God, watch out for that truck!

But she never forgot that whacky week back in 2007, when the days were all screwed up and her husband walked home one day after having died. The end.