Got a phone call from Mum today. She's wondering what present to get my brother for his birthday. My brother, unfortunately, has an appalling taste in music, his favourites being musicians like Delta Goodrem and Hilary Duff. Mum was wondering if she should get him one of those.
He also has an odd taste in present-giving. Once he gave Mum a singing plastic fish as a present, and he got into a habit of buying the Guinness Book of Records and giving it to me as a Christmas present. But I'm a sly devil; I tricked him last year, and bought the Book of Records for him as a birthday present before he could get it for me as a Christmas present.
Then again, the other thing about my brother is he is an absolute nutter when it comes to alien-conspiracy-tin-foil-hat-theories. He has a whole bookshelf stacked with books by self-styled Ufologists, and he will read them obsessively. Mum tells me, quite sensibly, that she wants to get him off this stuff. Good luck to her.
Wait a minute ... I've got it! The perfect present for my brother would be:
DELTA GOODREM'S BIG BOOK OF ALIEN CONSPIRACY THEORY RECORDS
I'm heading out just now to get a copy before they sell out. Gosh, this year, I'm going to be the BEST BROTHER EVER!
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7 comments:
What's wrong with Delta, Timmy?
Hmmmmm, answer the wrong way and a drink could land on your noggin at the next bloggers booze-up.
the shy lamb syndrome, the I'm-so-sweet-I-shit-daffodils persona, that that her voice is no more than a good average... I'm not saying she has a bad voice I'm just saying that there are heaps better talents around and I just don't get the fuss, and as for Hillary Duff I thought she was a chick-flick actress... and here is a birthday idea
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1402728239/qid=1129458178/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/103-3643992-4567018?v=glance&s=books
Didn't you mention something about tin-foil? I think a home made hat would be best. Or, perhaps, you could offer to rip out his bck teeth to rid him of that annoying tracking device...
Alternately, and just to piss your mum off, I'm sure Erich von Daniken must have something new out. Or even a fan club.
Darlene, I suppose there's nothing wrong with Delta in moderation, but my brother does EVERYTHING obsessively, and by obsessively I mean he will happily listen to a Delta song repeatedly for days without getting tired of it.
Nails, Rachel ... I like the way you're thinking. The Weekly World News Big Book of Facts ... an excellent birthday gift. And I'm sure Mum will agree wholeheartedly!* (See footnote)
*Vehemently disagree.
by the way, how old is this brother?
23, turning 24. I think I mentioned him at the grogblogging?? He has aspergers syndrome and works at a Newcastle place called 'Hunter Special Industries' for a pittance.
ah yes, you did mention... I just have a shocking memory! Well, I guess that means he can be forgiven for Hilary, but the jury is still out on Delta...
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