kidattypewriter

Monday, April 23, 2007

List Of Smitings

(NOTE: This list is incomplete)

The Seven Plagues of Egypt

The Four Mildly Irritating Influenzas of Akkadia

The Two Really Smelly Twins of Bethsherharazad

The Striking Down Of The Palestinians By Lightning

The Static Shock Jehosaphat got when he Picked His Nose on the Sabbath

The Smiting of the Philistines With Haeommorhoids and Mice

The Nine Pesky Puppies of Jerusalem

The Really Really Itchy Fleas of Shemorgazad

The Unfortunate Incident With Onan and the Superglue

The Fifteen Tedious Bureaucrats of Dormogon

The Two Boils of Baalam


Yikes! It's mice! There's a smitin' underway!

19 comments:

Shelley said...

I apologise in advance for this.


Awwwwwwwwwwwwww look at the cute little mice!

TimT said...

So I said to Jehova, I said, 'Enough with the mice already! Smite people with something else, nobody's afraid of mice anymore!' But he just went ahead and sent them in.

No wonder Job got pissed off with him.

TimT said...

At least I didn't show a picture of the pesky puppies of Jerusalem.

Shelley said...

Mice are way cuter than puppies.

Still, you know, sometimes the old ways are beast.

TimT said...

I'm tempted to have a PUPPIES VERSUS MICELETS poll, but that would be too much, even for this blog. With that level of cuteness, Blogger would probably explode!

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Nice punstering, Nails.

Can we be smitten by hedgehogs? Pleeeease?

Shelley said...

I read something recently about a man who was smitten with a hedgehog. I believe he needed reconstructive surgery.

Shelley said...

Micelets? lol

TimT said...

No! I have to put my foot down about this, and I'm going to do it here and now...

OUCH!

F*&*^ing bl**%$^y hedgehogs!

Shelley said...

Hedgehogs look like grumpy punk Ewoks, don't they? Or, at least, those ones did.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Now, now, no dissing the 'hogs, or things could get ugly.

TimT said...

I prefer chocolate hedgehogs. To be perfectly dinky di, maybe I should have put up an echidna. Here's one, apparently it's the 'rare white echidna'.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

There used to be a couple of those chaps at Taronga Zoo. I think they were from PNG. Pale yellow, and bigger than your average echidna.

Jo said...

A list of smitings without mention of Catriona Rowntree.

Interesting.

Steve said...

Tim, you seem to have a very large female following. I am feeling my masculinity is threatened by being one of the few male contributors here (along with that other Tim.)

BTW, I think rats are cuter than mice and smell less. (Or at least female rats. Males have overlarge testicles that also make me feel inadequate.)

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

You think YOUR masculinity is threatened? You should see MY masculinity. Beseiged on all sides.

Shelley said...

I dunno, Alexis, at least you ocasionally get called by male names. I never do.

*woe*

TimT said...

Must be the femasculating effect of this blog.

Femasculating rhythm,
Ba ba ba ba ba,
Femasculating rhythm,
Ba ba ba ba shoo wop.

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

It's true, Nails, I should count my blessings. A couple of years ago when I was on my way to a bagpiping gig, an elderly woman tried to shoo me out of the gels' loos at Circular Quay, suppoising me to be an intruding chap. Nothing like a sporran to confuse the old folk.

Email: timhtrain - at - yahoo.com.au

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