What Does Google Know About Shakespeare?

A Conceptual Interview

Our revels now are ended. These our actors,
As I foretold you, were all spirits, and
Are melted into air, into thin air:
And, like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capp'd towers, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve,
And, like this insubstantial pageant faded,
Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff
As dreams are made on; and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep. - William Shakespeare, via Google



The facts are as follows: Shakespeare is a great English writer who has a lot to say about everything. He does not, however, have anything to say about Google. Google is a 21st-century, state-of-the-art search engine with everything to say about something. For that matter, it has a lot to say about other things, too. It certainly has something to say about Shakespeare. To find out what that something is, I've invited Google onto my blog for an interview.

TIM: Google, thanks for agreeing to this interview.

GOOGLE: Not a problem, Tim.

TIM: Google, what do you know about Shakespeare?

GOOGLE: That's an interesting question. Have you visited Explore Shakespeare with Google? The google blog also has a post about Shakespeare ... But what happens when you miss a dose of Shakespeare? And let Google direct you to the Amazing Web site of Shakespeare's Sonnets. By the way, let Google be the first to tell you that Shakespeare was not Shakespeare! Shakespeare was in fact Christopher Marlowe who was Francis Bacon, who was Edw...

TIM: Google! I can't understand what you're saying!

GOOGLE: I apologise. Google can't understand what Google's saying either, since Google is just a mechanical device devised by a group of mathematicians in order to be able to ...

TIM: Google, you seem to know a lot of facts about Shakespeare. How many of these facts are true?

GOOGLE: I'm glad you asked that. Did you know Google has about 74,700,000 pages on Shakespeare? Of these, the most popular is the website www.shakespeare.com. Also, there are about 21,600,000 pages under the title 'William Shakespeare', and 19 pages about 'Nicholas Shakespeare. ' Furthermore ...

TIM: Google! Stop! I'm beginning to doubt that you actually do *know* anything about Shakespeare at all!

GOOGLE: What is this 'doubt' you speak of?

TIM: Google, let's go to another subject. Google, what can you tell me about Google?

GOOGLE: Well ... (takes deep breath)