Saturday, December 31, 2016

The time for the ancient ceremony has arrived

''IT IS THE TIME', said Macca to Wally,
'To go down the hill in our shopping trolley'
'Then let it be so', said Wally, and Lo!
They went down and smashed up like FUCK in the valley below.

Saturday, December 24, 2016

Who the heck is Carol?

You know, there's been a lot of talk lately about kids not being able to sing carols in schools anymore and what not, but I don't know. I think I've come up with the perfect carol for such situations. Nobody could possibly get offended by it at all.

Nobody Knows Carol

Where are we going? 
Nobody knows. 
Where do we come from? 
Nobody knows. 
Why celebrations? 
(Not very clear)
Just as we did
The same time last year - 
It's not very clear
What nobody knows
And nobody knows
What nobody knows - 
Nobody, nobody knows. 

Whose birthday is it? 
What's all this for? 
Nobody knows
Plus we're not really sure - 
We hope it is merry,
Though who can tell why? 
If nobody talks
Nobody will lie - 
Though who can tell why
If nobody knows
And nobody knows
What nobody knows - 
Nobody, nobody knows. 

Would I tell if I should,
Should I tell if I could? 
Nobody knows
If I should or would - 
So don't even think
And don't ask don't tell
For no-one was born
And it's just as well
And don't ask don't tell
What nobody knows
For nobody knows
What nobody knows - 
Nobody, nobody knows. 

*Whispers*. Merry Christmas everyone. 

Thursday, December 08, 2016

It's alive! I hear they have a pill for that now!

Hello and here is an article about euthanasia and for no reason here are some exciting new medical euphemisms I invented.

Treatment for existential dependence disorder.

Performing whole body amputations.

Involuntary respiratory therapy.

Pre-vegetative state.

Suffering from unified personality disorder.

Extreme delayed terminus syndrome (EDTS).

Euthanasia for persistent non-dysfunctionality.

Suffers from existential ideation.

Subjective continuation dysfunction.

Alleviation of sense of severe normalisation and ongoing prolongation of being.

Treatment for over-functionality of self-actualisation.

Systematic externally-induced nescience.

Friday, December 02, 2016

Standing under what?

Some write to state their meaning clearly
I write to make mine foggy
So readers get it not quite nearly
And leave off, feeling groggy. 

Do comment if you don't understand, and don't comment if you do understand.
Email: timhtrain - at -

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