The wonderful wide world of transport

Maybe I'm just jaded because I'm only two hours off a crowded peak-hour train, but what is it with forms of transport and grumpy people? People on the train fume about not getting enough space, people driving cars grump about others walking out onto the road, people walking out into the road get into a lather over the scoundrels in the cars, people on bikes work themselves up into righteous rages because of all the slow pokes who are walking (and all of the fast pokes who are driving), and people on trams, I suppose, must get outrageously outraged because someone is speeding past them using their zimmer frame. What a lot of furious people there seem to be, going at various velocities to various destinations, and all directing their civilised ire, their cultivated umbrage, their passive aggression at one another while they zoom onwards!

I would have said that it was different a few generations ago, when everyone went about on horses, but then again, it wasn't really. Instead of passive aggression, they were often aggressively passionate, and went about donging one another with great big broadswords or lances and what not. (Actually, that sounds quite fun. Can we try that on the trams, do you think? Could we pay for the privilege on Myki?)

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Meanwhile, I'm finding the occasional sight of police on the trains rather plaintive. I know it's something to do with making the public feel safe or some crap like that, but is it just me who imagines that it's because the force has become so cash-strapped that it has to use public transport? It makes me wonder just what sort of exciting high-speed chases they could get up to: 'suspect is on 5.41 train to Clifton Hilll... he's getting off at Clifton Hill to change to the Hurstbridge line... quick! We'll intercept him at the station! Oh NO! We're at Northcote and a member of the public is holding the door open so his mum can get in... THERE ISN'T MUCH TIME....!'


Hmmm, yeah, I suppose it probably is just me.